The Drive

Ask any of the Fancy Ducks about "The Drive," and we'll know what you're talking about.  And we'll probably start either laughing hysterically, or sobbing.

Leaving the Michigan Theater in Ann Arbor, we knew it was going to be tight.  Google listed the drive to Matteson, IL at about four and a half hours, so, with appropriate breaks, we were looking at getting in pretty late by Theatreworks standards: around 9 or 10.  Not impossible by any means, but it was cutting into our 12-hour rest period, which meant a nice little extra in our future paychecks.  However, a major snowstorm had just dumped almost two feet of snow in Minnesota and Wisconsin (collapsing the Metrodome in Minneapolis and shutting down school for the first time since I was in 6th grade), and it didn't seem to be letting up.  David checked weather reports and, while the snow seemed to be letting up (Ann Arbor was just a little overcast), the wind and cold were not.  We crammed into the van, bounced back onto I-94 W, and hoped for the best.

About two hours into the drive, immediately after we took a bathroom break, traffic ground to a halt.  David surfed radio channels for information while those of us with smartphones Googled around for anything we could find.  Nothing.  No information anywhere about what lay ahead.  And, outside, it looked like this:

(photo credit: Kristen)

After over an hour at a standstill, David called Theatreworks.  Since our venue the next day was a show sponsored by them, we wanted to find out if the show was indeed going forward.  You see, with conditions deteriorating, the road closed (apparently) and no information on when things would recover, it seemed like we were in for quite a haul.  Getting in touch with Teresa, our Company Manager, we learned that things were looking good for the show, so it was best to press on.  Whenever the conditions would allow.

After two hours stuck in traffic, the road opened, we zoomed forward (smelling gasoline residue while trying not to think about how it got there) and, realizing that it was now past 8pm on a Sunday, decided it was worth getting our dinner now.  The exit we tried promised a Panera, a favorite among most Theatreworks folks I've met.  We giddily headed there to fill up on food and caffeine.

But the evening had other plans.  The Panera closed at 8:00.  It was 8:07.

We searched and searched for something that would be open, settling for a Subway, KFC, Walgreens run.  Then it was back in the van, and off into the fray.

Winter driving is an acquired skill, and luckily we've got a few experienced drivers among us.  David started us off with stalled traffic and winter conditions that kept us below 40 mph on the freeway.  I took over afterwards and battled glare ice and huge wind gusts as we headed towards Benton Harbor, MI, the site of previous misadventure.  I threw on some loud dance music and, as the clock ticked towards midnight, Courtney turned into my personal life coach, offering me encouragement and support as I navigated the slippery, windy highways.  Suddenly, it was midnight, and break time, and Benton Harbor's Wal-mart seemed to be our best option.  I mean, Wal-mart's are open 24 hours, have clean bathrooms and caffeinated beverages.  I slowly pulled us off the freeway and headed towards the parking lot.  We grabbed our hats, dove head first into the wind, making a break for the Wal-mart doors.

They were all locked.

A nearby Meijer provided some relief, but the prior two hours were all my nerves could handle, so Kristen took over.  The ice and snow was gone, but the winds had picked up, limiting visibility as strong gusts blew powdery snow into our path.  Kristen is an incredibly good driver under pressure, and we were all getting a little giddy from the mounting lack of sleep, so we began a round of Mad Libs and guessing games to keep everyone occupied.  By this time, we had been traveling for over eight hours.

Matt finished our epic drive, carefully navigating us the rest of the way to Matteson.  When we arrived, it was 3:50am local time (remember, there's a time change in there), which meant we had been traveling for over 12 hours.  With a call at 7:45am, there was just enough time to check into the hotel and grab two or three hours of sleep. The children still needed their show.

I have never done a performance on three hours of sleep before.  It is almost an out-of-body experience.  Your brain hits a point where, if you engage it too much, it will try to trip you up, so all you can do is sit back and watch your body carry you through the show.  All the right words, moves and music came out (and the sound cues were in the right places), but I'm not sure any of us were aware how this feat was accomplished.  It was interesting for me, however, that, even in this state of extreme exhaustion, the show's intrinsic fun and energy still seemed to take hold of me.  It just seemed very, very far away.

As we grasped hands for curtain call (Kristen gave me an extra "We did it!" squeeze), something strange happened.  The audience -- all 125 strong -- jumped to their feat, cheering and whistling. With my head still spinning, it took me a few minutes to realize what was going on.  Our audience had just given us a standing ovation; the first of our entire, three month tour.  In my state of exhaustion-induced euphoria, it was hard to fully accept the full import of the moment but, looking back, it seems all to fitting.  Without any knowledge of their actions, this audience gave us the will to make it through what was easily the most difficult performance I have ever been called upon to complete.  But complete it we did.  Apparently, with style.

Call tomorrow: 7:45am, Super 8, River Grove, IL.  It's time to close this show.

Kid Quote of the Day: At one point in "Pirates Don't Change Diapers," my pirate faints dead away.  As I crashed down behind the flat, a little boy winced: "Ouchie.  He got a boo-boo."

Adult Quote of the Day: At around 2am, somewhere in Indiana, Courtney turned to me.  "Ethan," she said, "this is going to make a really good blog entry."